KAOZ!!
HOW CAN ANYONE MINDING THEIR OWN BUSINESS IN THEIR OWN HOMES EVER GET HARASSED!?!?!?!?!??!
I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS THAT CALLED.
MENTAL HARASSMENT? PSYCHOLOGICAL HARASSMENT?
WHATEVER!! I'M SO SO SO SO SO BLOODY PISSED AND FURIOUS NOW!!
ALL IDIOTIC MEN OUT THERE WITH NOTHING BETTER TO DO BUT HARASS PEOPLE IN THEIR OWN HOMES ALL DAY LONG
GO
DIE
NOW!!!
Sunday, August 27, 2006
Monday, August 14, 2006
+ o0pS! +
00ps! I did it again.
Sighs.... Yes, I'm beaten down flat out AGAIN! And i definitely did not ask for it.
How did it happen? Why pick on just me?
Thanks man, for showing me how stupid I am. Does it please you that much?
I know I'm dumb. I know I'm slow.
But I'm trying.
Hard.
I really am!
At least, give me some time to prove that I can do it.
I really want to do it.
And do it well.
I know I'm stupid, but come on, keep the challenges coming.
I hope you keep it coming on and on.
I know I will take a long time.
But I hope, even if it's Infinity later, that there will be a day when I can finally take it up and beat it flat down.
Then you can laugh all you want.
Sighs.... Yes, I'm beaten down flat out AGAIN! And i definitely did not ask for it.
How did it happen? Why pick on just me?
Thanks man, for showing me how stupid I am. Does it please you that much?
I know I'm dumb. I know I'm slow.
But I'm trying.
Hard.
I really am!
At least, give me some time to prove that I can do it.
I really want to do it.
And do it well.
I know I'm stupid, but come on, keep the challenges coming.
I hope you keep it coming on and on.
I know I will take a long time.
But I hope, even if it's Infinity later, that there will be a day when I can finally take it up and beat it flat down.
Then you can laugh all you want.
Sunday, August 06, 2006
+ sAy +
'Say, one day you wake up, and you realize that all that had happened in the past 20 years is actually just a dream. What would you do?'
This was just a passing notion I had one day, and I thought of asking my friends about it.
And it was a wonder to see the interesting initial responses by each individual, due to different perspectives, and even different intepretations.
"See if i like what i was then, or maybe will do what i really should have since i can learn from that dream....."
"Carry on with the current life after the dream. Reality is after all reality for us to continue living......"
"I would be in a total loss and feel helpless. I will try to find out what in reality happened to the 20 years when i am asleep........"
"Maybe at that very very moment when i know that, i may just cry. Mixed emotions. If those happy things that happened in 20 years are just a dream, isn't it rather sad.....?"
"I will feel lost. But then life goes on... who knows... maybe this reality you woke up to is just another dream again......"
"I will do nothing. It's just a dream. So just carry on living as per normal......"
"You mean i'll be asleep for so long......?"
"I think i'll be quite sad and lost. But after that i'll still live as normal, and keep the dream as memory......"
Some answers led me to lots of laughter, while some set me thinking. But actually none of these answers are crappy or whatever. In fact i find all of them good answers. Because my friends really thought through this question, and gave me answers that came from the very bottom of their hearts, which i appreciate a lot. Because some people might dismiss me as being crazy or don't even bother to entertain me. But these friends actually took the trouble to give it some thought, and actually tell me what they think. And some even went into deep discussions about it with me! Really thank you!
For those who know me well, they will know that every now and then, i'll pop questions that are quite neither here nor there(of course, the ideas usually pop into my head from out of nowhere too, thats why the questions are neither here nor there |pun intended| haha). Which is also why there will often be many ways to intepret those questions.
For those who just got to know me, well, there's more questions like this to come! Hahaha...
Anyway, for me, at that very moment, I will feel lost too. But after that, I will probably feel relieved. After all, it's a 20 years worth of lessons to learn, and decisions to be made. All the 'lessons learnt' and 'decisions made' in the dream, shall allow me more wisdom in living my current life. All the sadness in the dream will help me grow, and all the happiness in that dream, shall always be part of my memory. It's like having a second chance at Life again, even if it's 2 totally different lives.
One of these friends commented that it was as if he had always been living in a dream. Everything seems unreal. But to me, there seems no difference. Life is but a dream. So long as you live the way you want it to be, it doesn't really matter if you are living in a dream or reality, isn't it?
Sometimes, it's really a wonder how Fate works. Many a times, in the most unexpected situation, the most unexpected will happen. So much so that the unexpected become expected
(probability expectation: UNExpected multiply by UNExpected = Expected. UN is cancelled out).
Perhaps it's really true how the saying goes: In every dire situation, an opportunity arise.
It is only up to Fate if that opportunity is meant for you to grab, or it is meant to simply fall into your hands.
But then again, even when Fate has it that the opportunity falls freely into your hands, it is still up to you to hold it properly and not lose it. So in the end, it is still up to you to use it WISELY.
And therefore it is up to me. Even when I am very scared. Really very scared. But I can not, will not and shall not give up.
G00d luck to me!!
PS: This entry contains more than one topic, so apology if the words don't link.
PPS: Any feedback to the above question in the very 1st line is very welcome.
Disclaimer: The equation of "probablity expectation" is not taken from any printed textbooks and is wholly based on my own theory, aka CRAP lah!
This was just a passing notion I had one day, and I thought of asking my friends about it.
And it was a wonder to see the interesting initial responses by each individual, due to different perspectives, and even different intepretations.
"See if i like what i was then, or maybe will do what i really should have since i can learn from that dream....."
"Carry on with the current life after the dream. Reality is after all reality for us to continue living......"
"I would be in a total loss and feel helpless. I will try to find out what in reality happened to the 20 years when i am asleep........"
"Maybe at that very very moment when i know that, i may just cry. Mixed emotions. If those happy things that happened in 20 years are just a dream, isn't it rather sad.....?"
"I will feel lost. But then life goes on... who knows... maybe this reality you woke up to is just another dream again......"
"I will do nothing. It's just a dream. So just carry on living as per normal......"
"You mean i'll be asleep for so long......?"
"I think i'll be quite sad and lost. But after that i'll still live as normal, and keep the dream as memory......"
Some answers led me to lots of laughter, while some set me thinking. But actually none of these answers are crappy or whatever. In fact i find all of them good answers. Because my friends really thought through this question, and gave me answers that came from the very bottom of their hearts, which i appreciate a lot. Because some people might dismiss me as being crazy or don't even bother to entertain me. But these friends actually took the trouble to give it some thought, and actually tell me what they think. And some even went into deep discussions about it with me! Really thank you!
For those who know me well, they will know that every now and then, i'll pop questions that are quite neither here nor there(of course, the ideas usually pop into my head from out of nowhere too, thats why the questions are neither here nor there
For those who just got to know me, well, there's more questions like this to come! Hahaha...
Anyway, for me, at that very moment, I will feel lost too. But after that, I will probably feel relieved. After all, it's a 20 years worth of lessons to learn, and decisions to be made. All the 'lessons learnt' and 'decisions made' in the dream, shall allow me more wisdom in living my current life. All the sadness in the dream will help me grow, and all the happiness in that dream, shall always be part of my memory. It's like having a second chance at Life again, even if it's 2 totally different lives.
One of these friends commented that it was as if he had always been living in a dream. Everything seems unreal. But to me, there seems no difference. Life is but a dream. So long as you live the way you want it to be, it doesn't really matter if you are living in a dream or reality, isn't it?
Sometimes, it's really a wonder how Fate works. Many a times, in the most unexpected situation, the most unexpected will happen. So much so that the unexpected become expected
(probability expectation: UNExpected multiply by UNExpected = Expected. UN is cancelled out).
Perhaps it's really true how the saying goes: In every dire situation, an opportunity arise.
It is only up to Fate if that opportunity is meant for you to grab, or it is meant to simply fall into your hands.
But then again, even when Fate has it that the opportunity falls freely into your hands, it is still up to you to hold it properly and not lose it. So in the end, it is still up to you to use it WISELY.
And therefore it is up to me. Even when I am very scared. Really very scared. But I can not, will not and shall not give up.
G00d luck to me!!
PS: This entry contains more than one topic, so apology if the words don't link.
PPS: Any feedback to the above question in the very 1st line is very welcome.
Disclaimer: The equation of "probablity expectation" is not taken from any printed textbooks and is wholly based on my own theory, aka CRAP lah!
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
+ F0rMa| wEaR +
Why do I dislike wearing formal wear?
Firstly, because I have to stand and sit up straight!
Secondly, because the cloth material for office wear is too "unbreatheable"! Long sleeves, not breatheable, plus the hot weather makes me sweat till......
C00l on the outside, but 'raining' in the inside!
Thirdly, i have to wear court shoes with formal wear. Yes, they give me BLISTERS!!! Ouch!
Fourthly, they are expensive. Sobz..
But lastly, and most importantly, they are a facade to me. The main reason why I am not comfortable in formal wear is because whenever i put on formal wear, i give most people a wrong impression of confidence, maturity and wisdom, which is particularly useful during presentations. (But of course, once I speak, the facade will be shattered)
The fact that I write the above down is precisely because i am not trying to brag!
Because in reality, I am not confident. I am not mature. And I am definitely not wise!
And I certainly do not like people to think that I am a clever and confident girl only to tell me a few months later after knowing me that how much mistaken they were! (Even though they do not mean it to be a sneer)
I just want to say, how I look or whatever impression I give whilst wearing formally and behaving formally is totally unintentional. I have always tried to show the true me via my actions, words, behaviours. How I look, is totally beyond my control. Because i can't see myself.
Perhaps the day when i am able to say that i am comfortable wearing formal wear, when I am comfortable giving people the right impression of confidence and maturity, will be the day when I am truly, inside and out, a confident person. =)
Firstly, because I have to stand and sit up straight!
Secondly, because the cloth material for office wear is too "unbreatheable"! Long sleeves, not breatheable, plus the hot weather makes me sweat till......
C00l on the outside, but 'raining' in the inside!
Thirdly, i have to wear court shoes with formal wear. Yes, they give me BLISTERS!!! Ouch!
Fourthly, they are expensive. Sobz..
But lastly, and most importantly, they are a facade to me. The main reason why I am not comfortable in formal wear is because whenever i put on formal wear, i give most people a wrong impression of confidence, maturity and wisdom, which is particularly useful during presentations. (But of course, once I speak, the facade will be shattered)
The fact that I write the above down is precisely because i am not trying to brag!
Because in reality, I am not confident. I am not mature. And I am definitely not wise!
And I certainly do not like people to think that I am a clever and confident girl only to tell me a few months later after knowing me that how much mistaken they were! (Even though they do not mean it to be a sneer)
I just want to say, how I look or whatever impression I give whilst wearing formally and behaving formally is totally unintentional. I have always tried to show the true me via my actions, words, behaviours. How I look, is totally beyond my control. Because i can't see myself.
Perhaps the day when i am able to say that i am comfortable wearing formal wear, when I am comfortable giving people the right impression of confidence and maturity, will be the day when I am truly, inside and out, a confident person. =)
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