This is how the story usually goes:
Cinderella and Prince Charming met at the ball in a dance, under the eyes of the others.
Upon midnight, Cinderella left in a hurry before all magical effects disappeared.
In the process, she left a glass shoe.
Using the only clue aka glass shoe, Prince Charming searched all over the kingdom for Cinderella.
Eventually, he found her. They got married and lived happily ever after.
End of story.
I've always been amazed at how Prince Charming and Cinderella can fall in love with each other in just one night. What is so romantic about the story? Some say it's the extent that Prince Charming can go to to find the lady he loved. The only conclusion: Cinderella is too beautiful.
There are some similarities to the story.
It was also a ball.
It was also in a dance where the first meeting took place, also under the eyes of many others.
Upon reaching home, reduced back to the usual be-spectacled, messy haired, rundown dressed and careless self, which I am sure he will not recognize. (There is really a very great difference when being dressed up and dressed down)
Anyway, this story ended even before midnight. Haha.
But now I can understand where the most romantic part of the story is.
It is the moment of connection between Prince Charming and Cinderella.
Well, at least Cinderella left a glass shoe.
I only left a name.
WAKE UP! IT'S ALREADY MORNING! STOP DREAMING!
Okay. I'm not thinking or hankering after much. I admit I am no great beauty. I am content to have once been part of the story.
^_^
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
+ n|gHtMaRe +
Seems like what I feared is true.
But luckily, it ended before things get worse. But I'm not sure how long will the aftershocks last before it dies down though.
People are always scared to be rejected, scared of loss of face or whatsoever. But then, please spare a thought for the poor person who is rejecting. I feel it's such a traumatizing experience to be the one rejecting you know? Scared of hurting someone.
You see, the one rejecting is actually the victim of the circumstances. The problem is brought up by the one who is rejected, but the one rejecting cannot lie! And the one rejecting HAS to reject! And is forced to unintentionally hurt that someone who is being rejected. Do you know how hurting it is to hurt someone, and even without intenting to in the first place? So who is the victim now?
Anyway come to think of it, which is worse? Losing face, or hurting someone? Hmm....
Well. The moral goes down to, please people, next time you wish to express something to someone, please be more sensitive! Watch out for signs of any discomfort from the other party, and do not impose your ideas onto them even though the other party is freaking out like mad.
Any chances of not being rejected will be shot down immediately!
On another note, I know someone who is unfortunately involved in the recent case of the plane that met with a slight mishap. This is even more freaky than what I had been through the past few days, because this concerns life and death!! According to her family, she is still in shock, even though she has arrived safely in Perth with a slight sprain. She is a strong lady, but when she recalls the events that had happened on the plane, she is still shaken. Come to think of it, perhaps my reaction to my case is a bit over-reacted after all. This then, is considered a real nightmare.
Her family and friends kept telling her to let go of her newly established work overseas and just come back home, but I not very sure if she would let go. However, someone told me, ultimately in life, what is the most important? What will company you to the end? Family and yourself. So who cares about the career so long as you can be with your family safe and sound?
This really set me thinking. Real thinking.
True.
Ultimately, family and myself.
Ultimately.
*new ideas formulating in my mind*
But luckily, it ended before things get worse. But I'm not sure how long will the aftershocks last before it dies down though.
People are always scared to be rejected, scared of loss of face or whatsoever. But then, please spare a thought for the poor person who is rejecting. I feel it's such a traumatizing experience to be the one rejecting you know? Scared of hurting someone.
You see, the one rejecting is actually the victim of the circumstances. The problem is brought up by the one who is rejected, but the one rejecting cannot lie! And the one rejecting HAS to reject! And is forced to unintentionally hurt that someone who is being rejected. Do you know how hurting it is to hurt someone, and even without intenting to in the first place? So who is the victim now?
Anyway come to think of it, which is worse? Losing face, or hurting someone? Hmm....
Well. The moral goes down to, please people, next time you wish to express something to someone, please be more sensitive! Watch out for signs of any discomfort from the other party, and do not impose your ideas onto them even though the other party is freaking out like mad.
Any chances of not being rejected will be shot down immediately!
On another note, I know someone who is unfortunately involved in the recent case of the plane that met with a slight mishap. This is even more freaky than what I had been through the past few days, because this concerns life and death!! According to her family, she is still in shock, even though she has arrived safely in Perth with a slight sprain. She is a strong lady, but when she recalls the events that had happened on the plane, she is still shaken. Come to think of it, perhaps my reaction to my case is a bit over-reacted after all. This then, is considered a real nightmare.
Her family and friends kept telling her to let go of her newly established work overseas and just come back home, but I not very sure if she would let go. However, someone told me, ultimately in life, what is the most important? What will company you to the end? Family and yourself. So who cares about the career so long as you can be with your family safe and sound?
This really set me thinking. Real thinking.
True.
Ultimately, family and myself.
Ultimately.
*new ideas formulating in my mind*
Monday, October 06, 2008
+ fReAkEd +
Okay. When I said my next quarter will be very happening, and I am looking forward to it, I do not mean for it to happen right on the first day of the next quarter!!!
Totally caught me off guard!!
FREAKED!!
I have an urge to fully describe in detail what had happened, but i think I shall not, because I do not want to be reminded of this incident in such great detail ever again! Even thinking about it now still sends a shudder down my spine!
SPOOKED!
Argh! I really really hope this is not my worst fear coming true. Something I've been fearing for quite sometime! Let's just wait and see... Please don't let my fear come true!!
Anyway, I think I'm gonna have a nightmare tonight! How am I going to face tomorrow? Faint!!
But whichever and whatever, I'm gonna say something...
THANK YOU DEAR BRENDA!!!!!!
YOU REALLLY SAVED ME JUST NOW!!! THANKS for appearing and being there for me when I needed someone the most to keep myself SANE! Hahaha.. I know you know what I'm talking about!
Aiyo.... it's so dramatic.... Unbelieveable... ZZzzzz.....
Hope everything will return back to normal tomorrow...
Please!
No more stunts.
And don't think too much.
Totally caught me off guard!!
FREAKED!!
I have an urge to fully describe in detail what had happened, but i think I shall not, because I do not want to be reminded of this incident in such great detail ever again! Even thinking about it now still sends a shudder down my spine!
SPOOKED!
Argh! I really really hope this is not my worst fear coming true. Something I've been fearing for quite sometime! Let's just wait and see... Please don't let my fear come true!!
Anyway, I think I'm gonna have a nightmare tonight! How am I going to face tomorrow? Faint!!
But whichever and whatever, I'm gonna say something...
THANK YOU DEAR BRENDA!!!!!!
YOU REALLLY SAVED ME JUST NOW!!! THANKS for appearing and being there for me when I needed someone the most to keep myself SANE! Hahaha.. I know you know what I'm talking about!
Aiyo.... it's so dramatic.... Unbelieveable... ZZzzzz.....
Hope everything will return back to normal tomorrow...
Please!
No more stunts.
And don't think too much.
Sunday, October 05, 2008
+ Wa|k|nG t0wArDs SuNsH|nE +
Had a little conversation with someone yesterday.
Someone: Are you a student, or have you started working?
Me: Oh, I'm working already.
Someone: Just started? Or one to two years already?
Me: Hmm... Yea around two...
(I get that often, so I'm quite fine with it. What comes next is the first time though...)
Someone: Oh.. No wonder you still look so "chun2 qing2".
(No one ever use that to describe me before, so I don't really understand that word. Looked up the translator and it reads "pure". Ah-hem... I don't really think so huh? Now don't puke!)
Anyway, I gave a ??? look, and she continues..
Someone: Well yah, you haven't really been polluted by the society and workplace yet. This is good. Take more pictures while you can. Because five years later, you will no longer look the same anymore. This I can assure you. So you must take as many as possible.
Me: *speechless*
What? So I'm supposed to look old? More mature? Fierce?! EVIL!!?? POLLUTED?!?!?!?!
Sounds so scary! >.<
Anyway, having just lived a quarter of a century, (no no no... I'm not going to reflect on the past quarter.. not yet. My life is not based on quarters. How many quarters are there in 100 years? Four! And I'm not sure if I can even complete three! It's way too long in a quarter, and too little. My life is divided in tens, and i have not finished the tenth year of this division yet. So no reflections) it's time to plan for the next quarter, and what comes next!
I believe that the next quarter is going to be very happening, and I am actually quite looking forward to it, the good and the bad. One thing I am thinking of though, is that perhaps after this second quarter, things are going on a different pace. My parents will probably be too old to explore life with me. My brothers will probably can't stand the sight of me. My trusted friends will probably be too busy with their spouses and kids to spare time for me. I'll probably have all the time in the world to spend with myself. Not that I am scared. I have already thought of all the things I can do.
However, to do that, I will have to be really independent and resourceful. Therefore, in this coming quarter, in the midst of living my life my own style (as usual), I shall incorporate some measures to further develop myself in all possible ways.
What measures? What ways?
That's for me to find out, for you to wait and see! Hahaha!
~~ Walking towards sunshine, living the way I want it ~~
Yay that's right, people! Get a Life! Live it the way YOU want it to be!
Cheers!
Someone: Are you a student, or have you started working?
Me: Oh, I'm working already.
Someone: Just started? Or one to two years already?
Me: Hmm... Yea around two...
(I get that often, so I'm quite fine with it. What comes next is the first time though...)
Someone: Oh.. No wonder you still look so "chun2 qing2".
(No one ever use that to describe me before, so I don't really understand that word. Looked up the translator and it reads "pure". Ah-hem... I don't really think so huh? Now don't puke!)
Anyway, I gave a ??? look, and she continues..
Someone: Well yah, you haven't really been polluted by the society and workplace yet. This is good. Take more pictures while you can. Because five years later, you will no longer look the same anymore. This I can assure you. So you must take as many as possible.
Me: *speechless*
What? So I'm supposed to look old? More mature? Fierce?! EVIL!!?? POLLUTED?!?!?!?!
Sounds so scary! >.<
Anyway, having just lived a quarter of a century, (no no no... I'm not going to reflect on the past quarter.. not yet. My life is not based on quarters. How many quarters are there in 100 years? Four! And I'm not sure if I can even complete three! It's way too long in a quarter, and too little. My life is divided in tens, and i have not finished the tenth year of this division yet. So no reflections) it's time to plan for the next quarter, and what comes next!
I believe that the next quarter is going to be very happening, and I am actually quite looking forward to it, the good and the bad. One thing I am thinking of though, is that perhaps after this second quarter, things are going on a different pace. My parents will probably be too old to explore life with me. My brothers will probably can't stand the sight of me. My trusted friends will probably be too busy with their spouses and kids to spare time for me. I'll probably have all the time in the world to spend with myself. Not that I am scared. I have already thought of all the things I can do.
However, to do that, I will have to be really independent and resourceful. Therefore, in this coming quarter, in the midst of living my life my own style (as usual), I shall incorporate some measures to further develop myself in all possible ways.
What measures? What ways?
That's for me to find out, for you to wait and see! Hahaha!
~~ Walking towards sunshine, living the way I want it ~~
Yay that's right, people! Get a Life! Live it the way YOU want it to be!
Cheers!
Monday, May 19, 2008
+ tHe t|Me |s N0W +
It's been a long time since i wrote here. I've actually written a few entries, but did not post them up. Didn't feel the need to.
The time while i M.I.A.ed, I'd been here and there, trying this and that, searching for my identity. Or what i want to do with my life. I suppose this is the quarter life crisis?
Anyway, what with the Myanmar cyclone (till now i haven't been able to contact my Myanmar ex-colleague) and the China earthquake in Chengdu (I've been there just 2 months ago, and i can't imagine the places where my moo-prints are still fresh; they are totally different now)...
Gosh!
Millions are suffering!
Who cares about how much you earn in a year? or the next 10 years?
A big jolt on the head.
I guess this is it.
The time is now.
The time while i M.I.A.ed, I'd been here and there, trying this and that, searching for my identity. Or what i want to do with my life. I suppose this is the quarter life crisis?
Anyway, what with the Myanmar cyclone (till now i haven't been able to contact my Myanmar ex-colleague) and the China earthquake in Chengdu (I've been there just 2 months ago, and i can't imagine the places where my moo-prints are still fresh; they are totally different now)...
Gosh!
Millions are suffering!
Who cares about how much you earn in a year? or the next 10 years?
A big jolt on the head.
I guess this is it.
The time is now.
Thursday, July 26, 2007
+ |0Ve PeAcE n0t wAr +
Today i was quite bored during lunch. Therefore whilst letting my imagination run wild, i came up with this.
"I hate war because i love peace, so i am going to join in the War for Peace"
So am I a peace lover or not? I decided to sms that phrase to anyone who popped up in my mind, and i got quite a series of interesting answers. So before i forget them, here they are...
A: Thats campaign for peace, not war for peace. Wrong use of syllabus.
Me: What if i mean real war, not just a campaign?
A: If real war, then thats not a peace lover, its an idiot.
B: Hmm.. Chim question sia. You are fighting for peace. so okay lah, cansider peace lover bah.
Me: But if i fight a war, i will be disrupting peace. So does it still count?
B: War is going to start whether you join or not. Need to fight to end it early mah. Just like egg or chicken which comes first.
C: Hahaha.. your question is so silly. But i guess it depends on how you see it, as in whether the end can justify the mean. If so i guess you're still a peace lover.
D: I'm not sure if you're a peace lover, but i can bet you're a "peace a" lover! "Peace a" like in "Pizza" Wahaha. Lamez! Yeah its ironic.
E: Peace lover. Think "war for peace" means the action that you're going to take to achieve peace and not literally fight instead.
And the Best so far, together with a real life practical application...
F: You are a peace lover because the ultimate result is still peace. but if you use war to achieve peace, people will only blame you for bringing war and not be grateful for the peace in exchange. This is exactly why Bush fight Iraq.
So how? Should i hate Bush?
F replied, it's true that many innocent lives, including that of the soldiers and those who went to maintain peace after war, were lost. But imagine if Bush had not fought Iraq, the lives of the people in Iraq will still be in terror and still be in very terrible state. And people of other countries will also still be in terror wondering who will be the next target and when will they be targeted. However, not many people appreciate what Bush did, and the peace that was brought to them through the war.
C00l! Think of Perspective!!
Time for pondering!
"I hate war because i love peace, so i am going to join in the War for Peace"
So am I a peace lover or not? I decided to sms that phrase to anyone who popped up in my mind, and i got quite a series of interesting answers. So before i forget them, here they are...
A: Thats campaign for peace, not war for peace. Wrong use of syllabus.
Me: What if i mean real war, not just a campaign?
A: If real war, then thats not a peace lover, its an idiot.
B: Hmm.. Chim question sia. You are fighting for peace. so okay lah, cansider peace lover bah.
Me: But if i fight a war, i will be disrupting peace. So does it still count?
B: War is going to start whether you join or not. Need to fight to end it early mah. Just like egg or chicken which comes first.
C: Hahaha.. your question is so silly. But i guess it depends on how you see it, as in whether the end can justify the mean. If so i guess you're still a peace lover.
D: I'm not sure if you're a peace lover, but i can bet you're a "peace a" lover! "Peace a" like in "Pizza" Wahaha. Lamez! Yeah its ironic.
E: Peace lover. Think "war for peace" means the action that you're going to take to achieve peace and not literally fight instead.
And the Best so far, together with a real life practical application...
F: You are a peace lover because the ultimate result is still peace. but if you use war to achieve peace, people will only blame you for bringing war and not be grateful for the peace in exchange. This is exactly why Bush fight Iraq.
So how? Should i hate Bush?
F replied, it's true that many innocent lives, including that of the soldiers and those who went to maintain peace after war, were lost. But imagine if Bush had not fought Iraq, the lives of the people in Iraq will still be in terror and still be in very terrible state. And people of other countries will also still be in terror wondering who will be the next target and when will they be targeted. However, not many people appreciate what Bush did, and the peace that was brought to them through the war.
C00l! Think of Perspective!!
Time for pondering!
Sunday, March 25, 2007
+ L.T.C. +
Recently, I went for a leadership training camp, (LTC). A true leadership training camp, different from those typical LTCs. Those typical LTCs mainly train your confidence, teamwork and etc... But for this camp that i went, it's more like a self-discovery camp.
Learnt two things there.
"True Leadership is trained by being a leader."
Only by having the chance to be a leader can one truly experience and learn how to be a good leader. It's only when you lead can you learn true leadership.
And Leadership goes hand in hand with Respect. Respect for others, and others will respect you.
"If one persevere, he can create wonders."
This is one thing which i had learnt from one member of the camp, even though it was I who said this to him. This is applicable to not only him, not only me, and also to everyone else who doesn't give up!
I've really learnt a LOT! And I'm totally grateful for it! (Except for the immensely poisonous rash-looking mosquito bites all over my hands and legs that I brought back from the camp which totally itched for 2 whole weeks!! >.<)
Yea! Go go everyone! Cheers to all those who are still hanging on and never give up!
Learnt two things there.
"True Leadership is trained by being a leader."
Only by having the chance to be a leader can one truly experience and learn how to be a good leader. It's only when you lead can you learn true leadership.
And Leadership goes hand in hand with Respect. Respect for others, and others will respect you.
"If one persevere, he can create wonders."
This is one thing which i had learnt from one member of the camp, even though it was I who said this to him. This is applicable to not only him, not only me, and also to everyone else who doesn't give up!
I've really learnt a LOT! And I'm totally grateful for it! (Except for the immensely poisonous rash-looking mosquito bites all over my hands and legs that I brought back from the camp which totally itched for 2 whole weeks!! >.<)
Yea! Go go everyone! Cheers to all those who are still hanging on and never give up!
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
+ Of dReamZ and |dea|s +
Today, I had a little chat with this xiao mei mei who's working in my company as a part time office girl. She had just gotten her 'O' Levels results and gotten a place in NYP. But that course she got into wasn't what she wanted, and feeling rather dejected. And she was contemplating whether to pursue her dream course, and weighing the pros and cons and risk factors.
And then we started chatting about dreams(meng xiang) and ideals(li xiang).
She said, her dream is to produce music. Be an audio mixer or whatever, just be someone who can create nice music. But, since dreams can never come true, she shall never be one.
I said, "No..! Dreams can come true!" (As usual, my antics.)
Then she said, "Yah. People become famous because of their dreams." And she went on, saying that how nice it is to make your dream a reality, pursuing a dream career, doing what you love and have great passion in. How blissful that would be.
And I said, "that's an ideal."
She objected, "no. It's a dream."
I insisted, "that's an ideal. There is a difference between a dream and an ideal". (No idea why i insisted. Just felt it's different)
She thinks for a while.
I continued, "dreams is more of a guide. Ideals is more of the path."
And i shocked myself. Because these words just shot out of my mouth but i don't really understand them.
The girl thought she understood, "Ok. I think I know. It's like my dream is to do music, but my ideal would be to get into business and earn bigger bucks with better future prospects? Like a dream is to do what you love while ideal is to be really practical and be successful in reality?"
Now this feels even more wrong. and i rambled on without much sense.
"A dream is about what you love, passion is about why you love, and an ideal is about actually getting down to doing it."
How does this sound? Anyway the girl goes on to talk about how a career should work. One has to have passion in what he is doing in order to be able to continue doing it for the rest of his life. That would be to make his dream, his passion into his career.
As i listened to her, it suddenly occur to me as if I'm looking at a younger me. Those words would have been what I would have said many years ago. But I know that even when many years back as i say those idealistic words, deep in my heart i still knew a fact. And though i know it is cruel, i felt i still have to remind her about that fact.
"To be able to combine passion and career would of course have been the best. But always bear in mind that many people, in the process of pursuing their dream as their life career, they actually burn out their passion." I guess she understood, because she agreed.
But on my way home, i kept thinking, how do i define dreams and ideals? I concluded that, a dream is like a guiding light. It shows you the direction. Ideals are like the paths towards the light. And to reach the light, there can be many paths to choose from. So perhaps the challenge in life would be,
1) To find out what is your dream?
2) How to turn your dream into an ideal?
3) How to achieve your ideal?
Perhaps we can say, we cannot directly achieve our dreams, but we can achieve our ideals. Yet once we have achieved our ideals, it would also still mean you have achieved your dreams. Sounds confusing?
Let's say for 2 examples.
1st example: My dream is to be a singer, because I love to sing, and I want to let many people hear me and feel my passion for singing. To break it down, my passion is in singing, and my ideal is to be a singer. Instantly, everyone will think about the famous glamorous pop singers. But if i can't be the next Stephanie Sun or Rain, i can still achieve my dream! Other alternatives would be to sing in cafes, or sing in Ge-Tais, or sing in open lounges, or simply tape my songs and upload into the net for all to hear. All these are ideals too. If I only want to be a famous singer, then my passion would have been to become famous, not in singing.
2nd example: My dream is to be a doctor, so that i can relieve people of pain and help others lead a healthy life. However I'm too stupid and can't get into the medicine course in university. But i can take up first aid course and read up on health articles. Even if i can't be a qualified doctor, i can still be a medic during emergencies, and give advice to the people around me how to live healthier. You are still achieving your dream.
You don't have to make your dream/passion your career. Being a singer or a doctor is just the most straightforward way that's all.
We may all have the same dream, but each of us has our own ideals towards achieving it. That is the difference.
Anyway we've all heard of cases when people burn out their passion when they face the harsh facts of life while pursuing their dreams, so i shall not harp on that. But that thing is, i know all the above, alternatives or not, sounds so unreel and idealistic. But that's what ideals are. Ideals are meant to be idealistic. The challenge would be, how to turn your dreams into your ideals and how to work towards it.
Another formula again:
(the purest passion) + (all the practicality elements) = your ideal life
Once your ideal life is attained, you have realized your dreams. Even if you didn't manage to attain the ideal life, you are still in your correct direction, which is still as good! That is why, " 人因夢想而偉大"!!
Conclusion, dreams really can be achieved! The rest would be up to you to find out how to do that.
Perhaps that explains my last advice to the little girl about the fact. Maybe i want her to know that, even if she can't achieve her dreams using the most direct way, there are still many other ways. So long as she doesn't forget what is her truest dream, her purest passion, and keeps working towards it, someday, she may just achieve it!
And then we started chatting about dreams(meng xiang) and ideals(li xiang).
She said, her dream is to produce music. Be an audio mixer or whatever, just be someone who can create nice music. But, since dreams can never come true, she shall never be one.
I said, "No..! Dreams can come true!" (As usual, my antics.)
Then she said, "Yah. People become famous because of their dreams." And she went on, saying that how nice it is to make your dream a reality, pursuing a dream career, doing what you love and have great passion in. How blissful that would be.
And I said, "that's an ideal."
She objected, "no. It's a dream."
I insisted, "that's an ideal. There is a difference between a dream and an ideal". (No idea why i insisted. Just felt it's different)
She thinks for a while.
I continued, "dreams is more of a guide. Ideals is more of the path."
And i shocked myself. Because these words just shot out of my mouth but i don't really understand them.
The girl thought she understood, "Ok. I think I know. It's like my dream is to do music, but my ideal would be to get into business and earn bigger bucks with better future prospects? Like a dream is to do what you love while ideal is to be really practical and be successful in reality?"
Now this feels even more wrong. and i rambled on without much sense.
"A dream is about what you love, passion is about why you love, and an ideal is about actually getting down to doing it."
How does this sound? Anyway the girl goes on to talk about how a career should work. One has to have passion in what he is doing in order to be able to continue doing it for the rest of his life. That would be to make his dream, his passion into his career.
As i listened to her, it suddenly occur to me as if I'm looking at a younger me. Those words would have been what I would have said many years ago. But I know that even when many years back as i say those idealistic words, deep in my heart i still knew a fact. And though i know it is cruel, i felt i still have to remind her about that fact.
"To be able to combine passion and career would of course have been the best. But always bear in mind that many people, in the process of pursuing their dream as their life career, they actually burn out their passion." I guess she understood, because she agreed.
But on my way home, i kept thinking, how do i define dreams and ideals? I concluded that, a dream is like a guiding light. It shows you the direction. Ideals are like the paths towards the light. And to reach the light, there can be many paths to choose from. So perhaps the challenge in life would be,
1) To find out what is your dream?
2) How to turn your dream into an ideal?
3) How to achieve your ideal?
Perhaps we can say, we cannot directly achieve our dreams, but we can achieve our ideals. Yet once we have achieved our ideals, it would also still mean you have achieved your dreams. Sounds confusing?
Let's say for 2 examples.
1st example: My dream is to be a singer, because I love to sing, and I want to let many people hear me and feel my passion for singing. To break it down, my passion is in singing, and my ideal is to be a singer. Instantly, everyone will think about the famous glamorous pop singers. But if i can't be the next Stephanie Sun or Rain, i can still achieve my dream! Other alternatives would be to sing in cafes, or sing in Ge-Tais, or sing in open lounges, or simply tape my songs and upload into the net for all to hear. All these are ideals too. If I only want to be a famous singer, then my passion would have been to become famous, not in singing.
2nd example: My dream is to be a doctor, so that i can relieve people of pain and help others lead a healthy life. However I'm too stupid and can't get into the medicine course in university. But i can take up first aid course and read up on health articles. Even if i can't be a qualified doctor, i can still be a medic during emergencies, and give advice to the people around me how to live healthier. You are still achieving your dream.
You don't have to make your dream/passion your career. Being a singer or a doctor is just the most straightforward way that's all.
We may all have the same dream, but each of us has our own ideals towards achieving it. That is the difference.
Anyway we've all heard of cases when people burn out their passion when they face the harsh facts of life while pursuing their dreams, so i shall not harp on that. But that thing is, i know all the above, alternatives or not, sounds so unreel and idealistic. But that's what ideals are. Ideals are meant to be idealistic. The challenge would be, how to turn your dreams into your ideals and how to work towards it.
Another formula again:
(the purest passion) + (all the practicality elements) = your ideal life
Once your ideal life is attained, you have realized your dreams. Even if you didn't manage to attain the ideal life, you are still in your correct direction, which is still as good! That is why, "
人因夢想而偉大"!!
Conclusion, dreams really can be achieved! The rest would be up to you to find out how to do that. Perhaps that explains my last advice to the little girl about the fact. Maybe i want her to know that, even if she can't achieve her dreams using the most direct way, there are still many other ways. So long as she doesn't forget what is her truest dream, her purest passion, and keeps working towards it, someday, she may just achieve it!
Monday, February 12, 2007
+ i |0vE cHeAp0 sTuFFs +
Yea!! I finally got my OWN radio cum CD player!!
Haha... I know i'm very backward in technology and gadgets etc.. Nowadays, everyone are talking about ipods, mp3 players, mp4 players and blah blah... But too bad, I'm still proud to say after so many years, I've finally got myself a proper radio cum CD player all to myself!! wahahah... (Even though it's a cheapo one, which my bet will be it can last at most 2 years only if i take care of it properly :P )
Yea Yea!! I still remember, I got my FIRST cheapo receiver at a pushcart outside Cineleisure 5 years ago for only $8!! It's a small squarish silver n metallic blue thingy branded "Bailang" <-some cheapo brand i tink, but everyone thought it was some latest mp3 gadget! wahahah.. But guess what!? It actually stayed with me during all my mugging times, all the way till i graduate! Unbelieveable right?! And I no longer use it now because i used it too much, i lost the earphones.. oops! So I decided to let this good old friend retire, and get a proper big radio.
You must find it funny... I'm so old already, don't my house even own a radio!?!? Yea My house actually has quite a few radio... But guess what? They're all for show. Nobody uses them, because they find radios too noisy. NOISY?! -_-||
I used to listen to radio and CDs on computer, but now that i officially live at home now, I don't have a computer to my name; One in my brothers room shared by all, all shared that one. I do have one sitting in my room though, but not wired up. Simply because i don't know how to, and my brothers are too lazy to do it for me. ZZzzz...
So what do i do when i wanna listen to music?? Some early in the weekends, when no one is at home, or all are still sleeping, I'll switch on the radio in the living room, or blast my CDs using the CD player connected to my TV, which is like such a big waste of electricity. And on top of it, getting thrown by rubbish, pillows and bloodcurdling screams telling me to SHUT UP! Muahaha.. Too bad! Just wake up and let me have some music dear!
My brother is always telling me to just get a cheap ipod or whatever, which is like so cheap nowadays, and not as if i can't afford it, and still get to enjoy thousands of songs. Oh well, yea
indeed. And how long do I need to finish listening to all those thousands of songs? and how long do I need to scroll through that list of thousands just to find that one song which i simply feel like listening? Hmmm....
Most people don't buy CDs now. They just download. But recently, I'm just getting into the habit of buying CDs! Hahha...
Call me slow or a country bumpkin or what, I'm totally fine. I still feel that there are still some reasons why some stuffs should remain that way.
And a radio cum CD player boom box is just what I need after a long week of hard work. Cheers! ^^
Haha... I know i'm very backward in technology and gadgets etc.. Nowadays, everyone are talking about ipods, mp3 players, mp4 players and blah blah... But too bad, I'm still proud to say after so many years, I've finally got myself a proper radio cum CD player all to myself!! wahahah... (Even though it's a cheapo one, which my bet will be it can last at most 2 years only if i take care of it properly :P )
Yea Yea!! I still remember, I got my FIRST cheapo receiver at a pushcart outside Cineleisure 5 years ago for only $8!! It's a small squarish silver n metallic blue thingy branded "Bailang" <-some cheapo brand i tink, but everyone thought it was some latest mp3 gadget! wahahah.. But guess what!? It actually stayed with me during all my mugging times, all the way till i graduate! Unbelieveable right?! And I no longer use it now because i used it too much, i lost the earphones.. oops! So I decided to let this good old friend retire, and get a proper big radio.
You must find it funny... I'm so old already, don't my house even own a radio!?!? Yea My house actually has quite a few radio... But guess what? They're all for show. Nobody uses them, because they find radios too noisy. NOISY?! -_-||
I used to listen to radio and CDs on computer, but now that i officially live at home now, I don't have a computer to my name; One in my brothers room shared by all, all shared that one. I do have one sitting in my room though, but not wired up. Simply because i don't know how to, and my brothers are too lazy to do it for me. ZZzzz...
So what do i do when i wanna listen to music?? Some early in the weekends, when no one is at home, or all are still sleeping, I'll switch on the radio in the living room, or blast my CDs using the CD player connected to my TV, which is like such a big waste of electricity. And on top of it, getting thrown by rubbish, pillows and bloodcurdling screams telling me to SHUT UP! Muahaha.. Too bad! Just wake up and let me have some music dear!
My brother is always telling me to just get a cheap ipod or whatever, which is like so cheap nowadays, and not as if i can't afford it, and still get to enjoy thousands of songs. Oh well, yea
indeed. And how long do I need to finish listening to all those thousands of songs? and how long do I need to scroll through that list of thousands just to find that one song which i simply feel like listening? Hmmm....
Most people don't buy CDs now. They just download. But recently, I'm just getting into the habit of buying CDs! Hahha...
Call me slow or a country bumpkin or what, I'm totally fine. I still feel that there are still some reasons why some stuffs should remain that way.
And a radio cum CD player boom box is just what I need after a long week of hard work. Cheers! ^^
Sunday, December 31, 2006
+ FAreWe|| 2oo6, wE|c0Me 2oo7 +
Today, something funny happened.
Lunch, at the dining table. (In the background, Elder bro was preparing to go out. Little bro was already out.)
Mum(nonchalantly): Any agenda for today?
Me(chewing on my food): NNahh...
Mum(nonchalantly): How come?
Me(still chewing on my food): Why not? Isn't it good?
Mum(still nonchalantly): Of course it's not good. Means something is wrong. Young people staying at home and not out on the streets?
Me(still chewing...):Mmunch.. mmunchh..
Well, well, well... Anyone who knows my mum will find the episode above funny, just like me. Because my mum will never say this kinda words. And for me, under normal circumstance, i would have replied, "Oh.. But i thought you prefer me to stay at home and dislike me going out?" Of course, this piece of truth would have unleash a long argument and then a cold war between the 2 of us. Truth is, people dislike to hear truths, and she's one of them.
But then, since one of my resolutions for the new year is to reduce as much conflicts as i can in the family(though that's been my resolution for many years), i decided to start practicing it on the last day of this year, and kept my mouth shut. And yea.. I managed to finish my lunch in peace. Cheers!
But I wasn't lying when i said i have no agenda for today. And so here I am, sitting before the computer, finally having it all to myself, munching on hot steaming chwee kuehs and having a slight fever, perhaps this will be how i will be spending the last few hours of 2oo6. Okay I know, at this late hour still eating chwee kuehs even though i had my dinner, it's really sinful. Well, just let me indulge in these sins for today k? I'll start my slimming program next year, in a few hours' time yea? Hehehe..
Year 2oo6.
It has been a good year. When i say good, it doesn't mean only good things happened. You wouldn't call a movie good just because it is a comedy, right? Same here. It's been a long year, where many milestones are set, of endings and beginnings, of losing my way and then finding it again, of learning & growing up and then recovering the innocence underneath, of seeing the bad and the ugly, and finding the beauty within. It's like an exciting rollercoaster ride. So adventurous. So good.
I had started the first 3 months of this year struggling. My final semester in university. It was terribly scary. All the hopes that i can't afford to dash. All the determination and discipline. Well, though still not very diligent as compared to many other fellow classmates, still, i had never been this determined all my life. I had never wanted something so much. And that is, to graduate. And amazingly, of the 8 papers i had, 7 times i had walked out of the hall feeling alright. Without those "I'm DEAD!" feeling. But more of those "There, I've done the BEST I could. The rest is up to the Heavens to see if it wants me dead or alive."This kinda feeling is something i had not felt since my O' Levels. O'levels, not even A'levels. How long had that been?
Hmm.. But that 1 out of eighth time, well, i don't feel like recalling them just yet. It was too scary to even think of it. It almost broke me. Thank God it didn't affect the rest of the papers after that. After the exams, people started looking around for jobs. But I was at a loss. One thing was uncertain, I don't know if i can graduate. Hence I don't dare to look around for a job properly. Yet I was given a choice of an alternative, not in the line of what i studied. Well, I was certainly attracted, and I decided to give it a try.
Financial adviser.
This is something i believe would have worked out for me if i keep on persevering. And I knew it would be REAL HARD work in the initial stages, but the fruits would be sweet. And I bummed around. This period was really a time of self discovery. What I really want? what I really like? what I really am good in? What I really am? Dark times ahead.
But i still decided Finance is not for me, at least for now. I know too little of this world, i know too little of myself, to give real advice and be responsible to people. I am an indecisive person, but I'm not fickleminded. Once I decided on something, I would not change my mind. Not for a long time. So even though I had wasted some big cash, some big time and seen a bit of the bad sides of human, I was still thankful for this period of muddy self discovery. For it was because of this that I realized I could, and should always trust my gut feeling, for it would never lie to me. And it was due to this, that i finally decided on my career path.
Civil engineering.
Yea. Before I went to Beijing, I got my results. I graduated. At Beijing, I finally saw the places i've always wanted to see.
The Great Wall of China. The Forbidden City.
The origin of many stories. So colourful and glamourous, and yet so dark. So much room for imaginations to run. And with a lot of jiao3 zi. ^_^ After I came back, it was time for serious job hunting. And the wonderful part was, all my resumes were sent to engineering jobs. So determined I was right? Hahaha...
Graduation Day.
It was nothing too glamourous. But still, worth a place in my memories. All were accounted for in this entry=> Graduation Day
Anyway, I went for 4 job interviews in total. And my determination in earning a living in th engineering line strengthened with each interview. Till the last interview. I was forced to face the reality, the truth about myself. I am just an incompetent escapist. A bummer who happily tries to get past life just by breathing and laughing everyday.
To achieve, to do constructive things, to get a real life, one must have the real ability in one way or another. And I have none. I was totally shamed, not by others, but by myself. I said at the beginning already. People dislike hearing truths. I am one of them. I can't even face it. But this last interview made me even more determined to do well in this line. And believe it or not, the very next day, this company gave me the job.
Heavens certainly like to make fun of me, making my emotions go on rollercoasters. Is It not scared I'll have a heart attack or a nervous breakdown? Anyway I don't know what made me, but i accepted the job. But this is just the beginning of another rollercoaster ride.
NICE, but very CAPABLE and CLEVER colleagues.
I have learnt to be brave everyday. University life made me. And i'm suddenly thankful for it. The new faces, new environment and everything. I just have to take a deep breathe and suck everything in. And be myself. In this company, just in this short period, I've already been through a depression period.
Never to depend on others.
Because no matter how nice the people are, there will always be one day when you realize that when you need help the most, there will be no one to offer a helping hand. Then again, you have to realize that people do not mean to hurt you in this way. Yet they are never obligated to be there for you every time you are in trouble. That's the way it is. You just have to learn how to survive and dig your way out on your own. This is all part of growing up. Yea, I just grew an inch! =) So in all, I'm still proud to say i've got nice colleagues who are nice to me. At least they do not harm me intentionally. And they made me eat healthy lunches. ^^
This year, I went for my 1st overseas trip without my family! Even though it's with my company for a short retreat where there's still adults, (oops! i forgot i'm also an adult now) still, it marks the beginning of freedom. With this first time, there's going to be many more times coming up, of me going overseas without my parents watching over me! How very nice that feels... Freedom is finally catching up, how ever late it is....
And guess what? Yesterday, my dear roomy got ROM-ed!!! My first friend to get married! It came as a wonderful surprise for all of us when we receive her invitation!
Bless you girl! May you live happily ever after! =D
And I believe, as usual, that I will be receiving more invitations soon, news of my friends getting married one by one! Muahaha! I really can't wait! =P
But wait!
10 more seconds!
9..
8..
Farewell 2oo6! It's been a good year!
3..
2..
1..
Welcome 2oo7!
All the best! ^^
Lunch, at the dining table. (In the background, Elder bro was preparing to go out. Little bro was already out.)
Mum(nonchalantly): Any agenda for today?
Me(chewing on my food): NNahh...
Mum(nonchalantly): How come?
Me(still chewing on my food): Why not? Isn't it good?
Mum(still nonchalantly): Of course it's not good. Means something is wrong. Young people staying at home and not out on the streets?
Me(still chewing...):Mmunch.. mmunchh..
Well, well, well... Anyone who knows my mum will find the episode above funny, just like me. Because my mum will never say this kinda words. And for me, under normal circumstance, i would have replied, "Oh.. But i thought you prefer me to stay at home and dislike me going out?" Of course, this piece of truth would have unleash a long argument and then a cold war between the 2 of us. Truth is, people dislike to hear truths, and she's one of them.
But then, since one of my resolutions for the new year is to reduce as much conflicts as i can in the family(though that's been my resolution for many years), i decided to start practicing it on the last day of this year, and kept my mouth shut. And yea.. I managed to finish my lunch in peace. Cheers!
But I wasn't lying when i said i have no agenda for today. And so here I am, sitting before the computer, finally having it all to myself, munching on hot steaming chwee kuehs and having a slight fever, perhaps this will be how i will be spending the last few hours of 2oo6. Okay I know, at this late hour still eating chwee kuehs even though i had my dinner, it's really sinful. Well, just let me indulge in these sins for today k? I'll start my slimming program next year, in a few hours' time yea? Hehehe..
Year 2oo6.
It has been a good year. When i say good, it doesn't mean only good things happened. You wouldn't call a movie good just because it is a comedy, right? Same here. It's been a long year, where many milestones are set, of endings and beginnings, of losing my way and then finding it again, of learning & growing up and then recovering the innocence underneath, of seeing the bad and the ugly, and finding the beauty within. It's like an exciting rollercoaster ride. So adventurous. So good.
I had started the first 3 months of this year struggling. My final semester in university. It was terribly scary. All the hopes that i can't afford to dash. All the determination and discipline. Well, though still not very diligent as compared to many other fellow classmates, still, i had never been this determined all my life. I had never wanted something so much. And that is, to graduate. And amazingly, of the 8 papers i had, 7 times i had walked out of the hall feeling alright. Without those "I'm DEAD!" feeling. But more of those "There, I've done the BEST I could. The rest is up to the Heavens to see if it wants me dead or alive."This kinda feeling is something i had not felt since my O' Levels. O'levels, not even A'levels. How long had that been?
Hmm.. But that 1 out of eighth time, well, i don't feel like recalling them just yet. It was too scary to even think of it. It almost broke me. Thank God it didn't affect the rest of the papers after that. After the exams, people started looking around for jobs. But I was at a loss. One thing was uncertain, I don't know if i can graduate. Hence I don't dare to look around for a job properly. Yet I was given a choice of an alternative, not in the line of what i studied. Well, I was certainly attracted, and I decided to give it a try.
Financial adviser.
This is something i believe would have worked out for me if i keep on persevering. And I knew it would be REAL HARD work in the initial stages, but the fruits would be sweet. And I bummed around. This period was really a time of self discovery. What I really want? what I really like? what I really am good in? What I really am? Dark times ahead.
But i still decided Finance is not for me, at least for now. I know too little of this world, i know too little of myself, to give real advice and be responsible to people. I am an indecisive person, but I'm not fickleminded. Once I decided on something, I would not change my mind. Not for a long time. So even though I had wasted some big cash, some big time and seen a bit of the bad sides of human, I was still thankful for this period of muddy self discovery. For it was because of this that I realized I could, and should always trust my gut feeling, for it would never lie to me. And it was due to this, that i finally decided on my career path.
Civil engineering.
Yea. Before I went to Beijing, I got my results. I graduated. At Beijing, I finally saw the places i've always wanted to see.
The Great Wall of China. The Forbidden City.
The origin of many stories. So colourful and glamourous, and yet so dark. So much room for imaginations to run. And with a lot of jiao3 zi. ^_^ After I came back, it was time for serious job hunting. And the wonderful part was, all my resumes were sent to engineering jobs. So determined I was right? Hahaha...
Graduation Day.
It was nothing too glamourous. But still, worth a place in my memories. All were accounted for in this entry=> Graduation Day
Anyway, I went for 4 job interviews in total. And my determination in earning a living in th engineering line strengthened with each interview. Till the last interview. I was forced to face the reality, the truth about myself. I am just an incompetent escapist. A bummer who happily tries to get past life just by breathing and laughing everyday.
To achieve, to do constructive things, to get a real life, one must have the real ability in one way or another. And I have none. I was totally shamed, not by others, but by myself. I said at the beginning already. People dislike hearing truths. I am one of them. I can't even face it. But this last interview made me even more determined to do well in this line. And believe it or not, the very next day, this company gave me the job.
Heavens certainly like to make fun of me, making my emotions go on rollercoasters. Is It not scared I'll have a heart attack or a nervous breakdown? Anyway I don't know what made me, but i accepted the job. But this is just the beginning of another rollercoaster ride.
NICE, but very CAPABLE and CLEVER colleagues.
I have learnt to be brave everyday. University life made me. And i'm suddenly thankful for it. The new faces, new environment and everything. I just have to take a deep breathe and suck everything in. And be myself. In this company, just in this short period, I've already been through a depression period.
Never to depend on others.
Because no matter how nice the people are, there will always be one day when you realize that when you need help the most, there will be no one to offer a helping hand. Then again, you have to realize that people do not mean to hurt you in this way. Yet they are never obligated to be there for you every time you are in trouble. That's the way it is. You just have to learn how to survive and dig your way out on your own. This is all part of growing up. Yea, I just grew an inch! =) So in all, I'm still proud to say i've got nice colleagues who are nice to me. At least they do not harm me intentionally. And they made me eat healthy lunches. ^^
This year, I went for my 1st overseas trip without my family! Even though it's with my company for a short retreat where there's still adults, (oops! i forgot i'm also an adult now) still, it marks the beginning of freedom. With this first time, there's going to be many more times coming up, of me going overseas without my parents watching over me! How very nice that feels... Freedom is finally catching up, how ever late it is....
And guess what? Yesterday, my dear roomy got ROM-ed!!! My first friend to get married! It came as a wonderful surprise for all of us when we receive her invitation!
Bless you girl! May you live happily ever after! =D
And I believe, as usual, that I will be receiving more invitations soon, news of my friends getting married one by one! Muahaha! I really can't wait! =P
But wait!
10 more seconds!
9..
8..
Farewell 2oo6! It's been a good year!
3..
2..
1..
Welcome 2oo7!
All the best! ^^
Saturday, December 09, 2006
+ And tHey L|vE hApp|Ly eVeR aFteR +
Perhaps no one would expect me to attend a wedding dinner of the sister of a friend all by myself.
But I just did. And boy, I'm really glad i did!
At first, I was so scared the groom and bride cant remember me. I had known the bride through my friend(of course! the bride is her sister!) and we had went swimming and ktv-ing in her house for quite a couple of times. And I had a once or twice encounter with the brother-in-law, aka the groom, during the ktv sessions. When my friend asked if I wanted to go to the wedding although i would be alone, I had readily agreed. I wanted to give my blessings to them on this big day and I wish to witness and be a part of their "happily ever after".
But I admit there was a tiny tinge of regret when i sat down at my allocated table in the midst of strangers, back facing the stage somemore. Why had I insisted coming even though i had expected to land myself in such awkward situation? But then, being the usual me, and of course with nice people sitting by my sides(I was literally sitting between a group of friends!), we soon started small chats. Anyway i began to like my environment.
After which the whole event start, and.... OMG!!! It's so........... NICE!!!! I LOVE WEDDINGS!! People I know always think attending weddings is a chore, because they have to give red packet (Red bomb they call) and sit through 2 hours to rot. But seriously, if it's for such a joyous event,
WHY NOT?!?!?!?? At most I'll save up on a few clothes, a few cds and a few big meals thats all! I don't wanna miss weddings. And definitely not this one!
Especially when the emcee announced that the groom is going up the stage to sing a song!
WOW!
The lady beside me and I simply looked at each other with BIG eyes and exclaimed a big "WOW". This is so unheard of, at least to me. I KNEW he can sing. Remember he joined us in the ktv session? So he sang an oldie "Wo shi zhen de fu chu wo de ai" -> I really gave all my heart.
AIYO! It was NICE!!! Can see he really meant all the words sia... During the last part, he came down the stage and stood beside his bride, crooning to her... Awww... I thought the bride would join him on stage. But nope. She was too busy crying.. W00000ooooo!!! SSSOOOOO ROMANTIC!!!! SO SWEET!!!! I saw that scene and was so touched a tear nearly got squeezed out. Luckily I didn't, else people might think I'm crazy.
After that, they came around.. I don't know if the groom still remembers me. I know he thought i looked familiar, he must have. Hahaha... But I was sure the bride recognise me.. She was smiling hard at me. Probably she was scared I would feel lonely bah. Well, I told her i wasn't.
GUESS WHAT!?!?!? They will be going on honeymoon, in January, for 10+ days, to EUROPE!!!! Paris, Germany and etc!! W00h00!!! Xin Fu Couple!! So good!
I'm sooooooooooooooo glad I went to their wedding and witnessed their blessed and filled-with-happiness faces! I want to bless the newly wed couple again and again and again and again and again.....
May both of you live happily together ever after!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But I just did. And boy, I'm really glad i did!
At first, I was so scared the groom and bride cant remember me. I had known the bride through my friend(of course! the bride is her sister!) and we had went swimming and ktv-ing in her house for quite a couple of times. And I had a once or twice encounter with the brother-in-law, aka the groom, during the ktv sessions. When my friend asked if I wanted to go to the wedding although i would be alone, I had readily agreed. I wanted to give my blessings to them on this big day and I wish to witness and be a part of their "happily ever after".
But I admit there was a tiny tinge of regret when i sat down at my allocated table in the midst of strangers, back facing the stage somemore. Why had I insisted coming even though i had expected to land myself in such awkward situation? But then, being the usual me, and of course with nice people sitting by my sides(I was literally sitting between a group of friends!), we soon started small chats. Anyway i began to like my environment.
After which the whole event start, and.... OMG!!! It's so........... NICE!!!! I LOVE WEDDINGS!! People I know always think attending weddings is a chore, because they have to give red packet (Red bomb they call) and sit through 2 hours to rot. But seriously, if it's for such a joyous event,
WHY NOT?!?!?!?? At most I'll save up on a few clothes, a few cds and a few big meals thats all! I don't wanna miss weddings. And definitely not this one!
Especially when the emcee announced that the groom is going up the stage to sing a song!
WOW!
The lady beside me and I simply looked at each other with BIG eyes and exclaimed a big "WOW". This is so unheard of, at least to me. I KNEW he can sing. Remember he joined us in the ktv session? So he sang an oldie "Wo shi zhen de fu chu wo de ai" -> I really gave all my heart.
AIYO! It was NICE!!! Can see he really meant all the words sia... During the last part, he came down the stage and stood beside his bride, crooning to her... Awww... I thought the bride would join him on stage. But nope. She was too busy crying.. W00000ooooo!!! SSSOOOOO ROMANTIC!!!! SO SWEET!!!! I saw that scene and was so touched a tear nearly got squeezed out. Luckily I didn't, else people might think I'm crazy.
After that, they came around.. I don't know if the groom still remembers me. I know he thought i looked familiar, he must have. Hahaha... But I was sure the bride recognise me.. She was smiling hard at me. Probably she was scared I would feel lonely bah. Well, I told her i wasn't.
GUESS WHAT!?!?!? They will be going on honeymoon, in January, for 10+ days, to EUROPE!!!! Paris, Germany and etc!! W00h00!!! Xin Fu Couple!! So good!
I'm sooooooooooooooo glad I went to their wedding and witnessed their blessed and filled-with-happiness faces! I want to bless the newly wed couple again and again and again and again and again.....
May both of you live happily together ever after!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Monday, October 23, 2006
+ g00d & bAd +
In the working world, there are two kinds of people:
the good people, and the bad people.
The good people are those people who wants to get things done, and find all proper means to solve things quickly.
The bad people are those people who wants to get things done, but don't want to do the things themselves, and push everything to others.
I am glad that i'm now in the midst of good people. But currently I am green. Through and through. What will happen in the future I won't know. I do not wish to turn out into someone who push all responsibility to others, and then claim credit for it.
I hope to be someone who wants to get things done, and have the ability to get the things done, through my own credit.
Wow. Sounds really far and hard.
Can I achieve that?
the good people, and the bad people.
The good people are those people who wants to get things done, and find all proper means to solve things quickly.
The bad people are those people who wants to get things done, but don't want to do the things themselves, and push everything to others.
I am glad that i'm now in the midst of good people. But currently I am green. Through and through. What will happen in the future I won't know. I do not wish to turn out into someone who push all responsibility to others, and then claim credit for it.
I hope to be someone who wants to get things done, and have the ability to get the things done, through my own credit.
Wow. Sounds really far and hard.
Can I achieve that?
Saturday, October 14, 2006
+ tHe m|sTy b00k 0f tHe0r|eS +
Since nowadays I'm either too busy or not in any convenience to write, instead of writing long long essays, i shall summarize everything i wanna say and compile them into my misty book of theories. Short n simple n sweet. But still as making no head nor tail. Muahahahaha...
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
New additional Clause:
To Love is easier than to Hate.
To Hate is easier than to Try not to Love.
So why try not to love?
Just ask those one-sided lovers and secret admirers, and you'll know the reason.
So if you don't wanna fall for someone, simply hate them. It's easier, and it always work!
Wahahahaha.... :D
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
New additional Clause:
To Love is easier than to Hate.
To Hate is easier than to Try not to Love.
So why try not to love?
Just ask those one-sided lovers and secret admirers, and you'll know the reason.
So if you don't wanna fall for someone, simply hate them. It's easier, and it always work!
Wahahahaha.... :D
Thursday, October 05, 2006
+ 0Ne t|Ny gEsTuRe, a SwEEt m0mEnT +
Sometimes, things happen, for a reason.
Sometimes, things do Not happen, also for a reason.
This is what I have always strongly believed in.
And today proved how very true it is.
Somehow this morning, for an unknown reason, this someone just happened to rammage through her heap of luggage and happened to get hold of a piece of paper. And somehow, from that piece of paper, she happened to register what today had meant to me. And then, for another unknown reason, out of so many people, she only happened to reveal it to this one person who, by saying the two common words which anyone else could have said, would have the greatest impact on me. And even so, this person said it to me under the most unsuspecting, most unanticipated tiny gesture, which doubled the impact on my memory.
Why had all these happened? If one can link all these things that happened to happen, then, it doesn't just happened to happen. They had happened for a reason. And we can only account that reason to Fate. Fate itself is a miracle. What It has in store for us, we won't ever know. It will simply happen.
Just like today in another incident, for no reason, or for some unknown reason, i rejected a few invitations. Given some other day, I would have gladly obliged. But no, not today. No idea why. Then, this another someone came along, and revealed something about a mid-life crisis. And suddenly, I know that reason why i had rejected my own dates.
My time today, was made for this person. And I did. Why? I don't know. I just did.
Surprises are only meant for the innocent, for they alone know how to appreciate the true spirit of it.
I started today without high expectation. And today ended uneventfully. Yet, the amount of sweetness and meaning i gathered in this day, is comparable to the other 22 times of the same special day of my life.
Still a special beautiful day.
Sometimes, things do Not happen, also for a reason.
This is what I have always strongly believed in.
And today proved how very true it is.
Somehow this morning, for an unknown reason, this someone just happened to rammage through her heap of luggage and happened to get hold of a piece of paper. And somehow, from that piece of paper, she happened to register what today had meant to me. And then, for another unknown reason, out of so many people, she only happened to reveal it to this one person who, by saying the two common words which anyone else could have said, would have the greatest impact on me. And even so, this person said it to me under the most unsuspecting, most unanticipated tiny gesture, which doubled the impact on my memory.
Why had all these happened? If one can link all these things that happened to happen, then, it doesn't just happened to happen. They had happened for a reason. And we can only account that reason to Fate. Fate itself is a miracle. What It has in store for us, we won't ever know. It will simply happen.
Just like today in another incident, for no reason, or for some unknown reason, i rejected a few invitations. Given some other day, I would have gladly obliged. But no, not today. No idea why. Then, this another someone came along, and revealed something about a mid-life crisis. And suddenly, I know that reason why i had rejected my own dates.
My time today, was made for this person. And I did. Why? I don't know. I just did.
Surprises are only meant for the innocent, for they alone know how to appreciate the true spirit of it.
I started today without high expectation. And today ended uneventfully. Yet, the amount of sweetness and meaning i gathered in this day, is comparable to the other 22 times of the same special day of my life.
Still a special beautiful day.
Saturday, September 16, 2006
+ TrAns|t|0n Per|0d +
Finally, I've spoken.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
People always say, to cherish your school life as much as possible, because when you start working, you'll start missing your school life.
Hmm... How true is that? We will ask.
Then they will say, you will know once you start working.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And so, seven weeks after I signed my name onto that Letter of Appointment, six weeks after I started working, one month and a half after i declared that place as my second home, perhaps I am a little fit enough to comment a bit on the above statement.
Seriously speaking, I do enjoy working.
True, I enjoyed schooling. I enjoyed taking my own sweet time to lessons, and then barging into the class feeling stupid and then straining my neck attentively for any tips on the upcoming quizzes. I enjoyed dozing off during lectures and then suddenly came wide awake when the lecturer announced this big portion of the notes is not included in exams. I enjoyed snuggling up to my friends in my warm pink huge winter coat which i call "Pinkie" and whispering my previous encounters with some cuties and chong chong and dong dong to them while they were furiously taking down notes in lectures. I enjoyed the bazaars and events and free lunches held occasionally in school. I enjoyed eating hot steamy deep-fried fish thin beehoon soup and jiao zi with my buddy during cold rainy days. I enjoyed rushing reports and rushing frantically from one end of the school to another to settle whatever issue that came up.
And I miss it all. But in a way, I do not wish to stay that way forever. Life consists of many stages, and the schooling stage is one of them. I enjoyed it fully, at least for the past six years, during which a large part of my character was developed. A way which i can call is Me. Of course there is still a LOT for me to learn and grow into, but at least Me took a bit of shape during these past few years. I guess the main reason why I totally loved the past six years and find it so memorable, is due to the thing that i most enjoyed doing, just being Me. I was glad I was given a chance to find Me, develop, and eventually given the chance to be a proper Me. I don't know if anyone can understand this whole chunk, but being myself is a simple thing that i didn't have the privilege of doing long time ago.
But as it is, the schooling stage has ended for me. Perhaps in future I might still go back to the books again, but the whole experience will be entirely different. I had cherished and will always love my school days.
Yes, Life moves on. The next stage shall be the working stage i presume. I've moved on, but there will always be a transitional period in between every stage to adapt to the new environment. For the first two weeks into working, I had nightmares almost every night, all of the same ending: I would wake up flustered, and then trying to remember whether my convocation had been all a dream, or am i really in the working world now? Am I waking up to go to school or go to work? I was so afraid to wake up and find myself having to go to school in the morning. I was so afraid I would wake up and find myself still a student and that I still have to go for exams; that would really be horrifying, because i havent touched the notes since a long time ago. I felt i had lost touched with books.
It would be contradicting to say i enjoyed my schoollife, and yet still be terrified at the thought of going back to school as a student. Indeed, this is not unusual at all, considering the immense stress I was under especially for the final year in Uni. I love the rushing for deadlines, I love the the cramming of information in a foot thick of notes into my brain during the night just before the exams. But I was afraid of the end results. I was afraid I could not get the required grades to pass, I was afraid I could not achieve the goals i had set for myself. I have to say, a lot had to be accredited to Luck. And therefore, having been lucky thus far, I hope not to go through it again. Once is enough. Twice is too much. Because my motto in Uni was "Luck never come twice", and true it was.
Perhaps that was another reason why till now, i enjoyed working. I am freed from that kind of stress, and I am more recovered to myself again. Of course, another contradiction. I said I had been Me for the past few years, so how can I be more recovered? Well, to be more precise, the very STRESSED Me showed up for the final year. I frowned more and stayed away from socializing because I prefer to spend more of my time on notes and my close friends rather than spending the time to get to know more friends all over again.
And now, being freed from that, I am more Me again. And to my own surprise, I'm totally alright with dining with five persons, one of whom I had only known for one month, and the rest totally strangers. This is something which I had not done/experienced since 2 years ago. This is like, SOooo ME lo! hahaha.... Eh, but still, please don't go around dragging me to meet new friends. Remember, once is enough, twice is too much! Hahaha... Aww.. Whatever.
Anyway, the comparison between schooling and working shall be done in due course, not now. But it is now time to sit down and address a question properly. A question which everyone will ask themselves at some point of time, and a question which i would always ask myself everytime I enter a new environment.
Do I remain Myself, and show everyone who I am?
Or do I hold back a bit of myself, and let the droning of the environment conform me?
Something struck me suddenly yesterday, and I felt I had to address this question, and solve it fast. I enjoyed schooling, and I enjoyed working. But there is something very different between both that is very disturbing. And I finally came to this conclusion.
In school, i can be choose my friends, and show my true self. At work, i observed that it seems wrong to show your Self. To say it simply, in school, everyone is free to show their true selves to each other and anyone they want. At work, everyone seems to be holding back a lot of themselves. How do I justify my words? I don't know. This is just a feeling and intuition that I got.
Of course, one may say I'm rushing, that it takes time for people to warm up to others, that because i only know them for six weeks, there's no need to be close friends too fast. But what I observed is not how their attitude towards me, but more of their attitude towards each other in general, me excluded. I can understand if people hold back themselves from me, but from each other? Who have worked together for at least half a year or one? Is this really their character or not?
To put it even simplier, it feels as if everyone is just Colleagues to each other. Nothing more.
Is that really how it should be? That there is no thing such as Friends in a working place? To spend ten hours each day together and still not reaching to a stage called Friends? Isn't it something pathetic?
Then it goes down to that question. Do I still insist being myself, and then increase the risk of being 'harmed' in the future? Or do I start my defense now?
That's pretty silly, because my policy has always been that, that more you defend, the more people want to attack you. That's probably one reason why till now, I havent really been attacked, because everyone already knows how stupid I am, whyfore should they attack me? Waste resources only. Muahaha....
But then, now this concerns my livelihood. What to do? What should I do?
Hmm...
I think by the end of this entry, I would have come up with a solution. And perhaps I already did. But I shan't say. Anyone who is patient enough to read every word till this point, would have guessed my solution.
But whatever, I think I will still bid my time to Grow Up, in the sense of behaving n thinking like what most working people do.
After all old habits die hard.
For example, I can never learn to process my thoughts before shooting them outta my mouth and end up getting into trouble.
Even if i do process my thoughts, I can never learn to sift what to say and what not to say, and end up saying the wrong things at the wrong time to the wrong person.
And I can never learn to make a right decision within a time as short as finish writing one blog entry.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Munchie! ^^
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
People always say, to cherish your school life as much as possible, because when you start working, you'll start missing your school life.
Hmm... How true is that? We will ask.
Then they will say, you will know once you start working.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And so, seven weeks after I signed my name onto that Letter of Appointment, six weeks after I started working, one month and a half after i declared that place as my second home, perhaps I am a little fit enough to comment a bit on the above statement.
Seriously speaking, I do enjoy working.
True, I enjoyed schooling. I enjoyed taking my own sweet time to lessons, and then barging into the class feeling stupid and then straining my neck attentively for any tips on the upcoming quizzes. I enjoyed dozing off during lectures and then suddenly came wide awake when the lecturer announced this big portion of the notes is not included in exams. I enjoyed snuggling up to my friends in my warm pink huge winter coat which i call "Pinkie" and whispering my previous encounters with some cuties and chong chong and dong dong to them while they were furiously taking down notes in lectures. I enjoyed the bazaars and events and free lunches held occasionally in school. I enjoyed eating hot steamy deep-fried fish thin beehoon soup and jiao zi with my buddy during cold rainy days. I enjoyed rushing reports and rushing frantically from one end of the school to another to settle whatever issue that came up.
And I miss it all. But in a way, I do not wish to stay that way forever. Life consists of many stages, and the schooling stage is one of them. I enjoyed it fully, at least for the past six years, during which a large part of my character was developed. A way which i can call is Me. Of course there is still a LOT for me to learn and grow into, but at least Me took a bit of shape during these past few years. I guess the main reason why I totally loved the past six years and find it so memorable, is due to the thing that i most enjoyed doing, just being Me. I was glad I was given a chance to find Me, develop, and eventually given the chance to be a proper Me. I don't know if anyone can understand this whole chunk, but being myself is a simple thing that i didn't have the privilege of doing long time ago.
But as it is, the schooling stage has ended for me. Perhaps in future I might still go back to the books again, but the whole experience will be entirely different. I had cherished and will always love my school days.
Yes, Life moves on. The next stage shall be the working stage i presume. I've moved on, but there will always be a transitional period in between every stage to adapt to the new environment. For the first two weeks into working, I had nightmares almost every night, all of the same ending: I would wake up flustered, and then trying to remember whether my convocation had been all a dream, or am i really in the working world now? Am I waking up to go to school or go to work? I was so afraid to wake up and find myself having to go to school in the morning. I was so afraid I would wake up and find myself still a student and that I still have to go for exams; that would really be horrifying, because i havent touched the notes since a long time ago. I felt i had lost touched with books.
It would be contradicting to say i enjoyed my schoollife, and yet still be terrified at the thought of going back to school as a student. Indeed, this is not unusual at all, considering the immense stress I was under especially for the final year in Uni. I love the rushing for deadlines, I love the the cramming of information in a foot thick of notes into my brain during the night just before the exams. But I was afraid of the end results. I was afraid I could not get the required grades to pass, I was afraid I could not achieve the goals i had set for myself. I have to say, a lot had to be accredited to Luck. And therefore, having been lucky thus far, I hope not to go through it again. Once is enough. Twice is too much. Because my motto in Uni was "Luck never come twice", and true it was.
Perhaps that was another reason why till now, i enjoyed working. I am freed from that kind of stress, and I am more recovered to myself again. Of course, another contradiction. I said I had been Me for the past few years, so how can I be more recovered? Well, to be more precise, the very STRESSED Me showed up for the final year. I frowned more and stayed away from socializing because I prefer to spend more of my time on notes and my close friends rather than spending the time to get to know more friends all over again.
And now, being freed from that, I am more Me again. And to my own surprise, I'm totally alright with dining with five persons, one of whom I had only known for one month, and the rest totally strangers. This is something which I had not done/experienced since 2 years ago. This is like, SOooo ME lo! hahaha.... Eh, but still, please don't go around dragging me to meet new friends. Remember, once is enough, twice is too much! Hahaha... Aww.. Whatever.
Anyway, the comparison between schooling and working shall be done in due course, not now. But it is now time to sit down and address a question properly. A question which everyone will ask themselves at some point of time, and a question which i would always ask myself everytime I enter a new environment.
Do I remain Myself, and show everyone who I am?
Or do I hold back a bit of myself, and let the droning of the environment conform me?
Something struck me suddenly yesterday, and I felt I had to address this question, and solve it fast. I enjoyed schooling, and I enjoyed working. But there is something very different between both that is very disturbing. And I finally came to this conclusion.
In school, i can be choose my friends, and show my true self. At work, i observed that it seems wrong to show your Self. To say it simply, in school, everyone is free to show their true selves to each other and anyone they want. At work, everyone seems to be holding back a lot of themselves. How do I justify my words? I don't know. This is just a feeling and intuition that I got.
Of course, one may say I'm rushing, that it takes time for people to warm up to others, that because i only know them for six weeks, there's no need to be close friends too fast. But what I observed is not how their attitude towards me, but more of their attitude towards each other in general, me excluded. I can understand if people hold back themselves from me, but from each other? Who have worked together for at least half a year or one? Is this really their character or not?
To put it even simplier, it feels as if everyone is just Colleagues to each other. Nothing more.
Is that really how it should be? That there is no thing such as Friends in a working place? To spend ten hours each day together and still not reaching to a stage called Friends? Isn't it something pathetic?
Then it goes down to that question. Do I still insist being myself, and then increase the risk of being 'harmed' in the future? Or do I start my defense now?
That's pretty silly, because my policy has always been that, that more you defend, the more people want to attack you. That's probably one reason why till now, I havent really been attacked, because everyone already knows how stupid I am, whyfore should they attack me? Waste resources only. Muahaha....
But then, now this concerns my livelihood. What to do? What should I do?
Hmm...
I think by the end of this entry, I would have come up with a solution. And perhaps I already did. But I shan't say. Anyone who is patient enough to read every word till this point, would have guessed my solution.
But whatever, I think I will still bid my time to Grow Up, in the sense of behaving n thinking like what most working people do.
After all old habits die hard.
For example, I can never learn to process my thoughts before shooting them outta my mouth and end up getting into trouble.
Even if i do process my thoughts, I can never learn to sift what to say and what not to say, and end up saying the wrong things at the wrong time to the wrong person.
And I can never learn to make a right decision within a time as short as finish writing one blog entry.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Munchie! ^^
Sunday, August 27, 2006
+ HARASSED +
KAOZ!!
HOW CAN ANYONE MINDING THEIR OWN BUSINESS IN THEIR OWN HOMES EVER GET HARASSED!?!?!?!?!??!
I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS THAT CALLED.
MENTAL HARASSMENT? PSYCHOLOGICAL HARASSMENT?
WHATEVER!! I'M SO SO SO SO SO BLOODY PISSED AND FURIOUS NOW!!
ALL IDIOTIC MEN OUT THERE WITH NOTHING BETTER TO DO BUT HARASS PEOPLE IN THEIR OWN HOMES ALL DAY LONG
GO
DIE
NOW!!!
HOW CAN ANYONE MINDING THEIR OWN BUSINESS IN THEIR OWN HOMES EVER GET HARASSED!?!?!?!?!??!
I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS THAT CALLED.
MENTAL HARASSMENT? PSYCHOLOGICAL HARASSMENT?
WHATEVER!! I'M SO SO SO SO SO BLOODY PISSED AND FURIOUS NOW!!
ALL IDIOTIC MEN OUT THERE WITH NOTHING BETTER TO DO BUT HARASS PEOPLE IN THEIR OWN HOMES ALL DAY LONG
GO
DIE
NOW!!!
Monday, August 14, 2006
+ o0pS! +
00ps! I did it again.
Sighs.... Yes, I'm beaten down flat out AGAIN! And i definitely did not ask for it.
How did it happen? Why pick on just me?
Thanks man, for showing me how stupid I am. Does it please you that much?
I know I'm dumb. I know I'm slow.
But I'm trying.
Hard.
I really am!
At least, give me some time to prove that I can do it.
I really want to do it.
And do it well.
I know I'm stupid, but come on, keep the challenges coming.
I hope you keep it coming on and on.
I know I will take a long time.
But I hope, even if it's Infinity later, that there will be a day when I can finally take it up and beat it flat down.
Then you can laugh all you want.
Sighs.... Yes, I'm beaten down flat out AGAIN! And i definitely did not ask for it.
How did it happen? Why pick on just me?
Thanks man, for showing me how stupid I am. Does it please you that much?
I know I'm dumb. I know I'm slow.
But I'm trying.
Hard.
I really am!
At least, give me some time to prove that I can do it.
I really want to do it.
And do it well.
I know I'm stupid, but come on, keep the challenges coming.
I hope you keep it coming on and on.
I know I will take a long time.
But I hope, even if it's Infinity later, that there will be a day when I can finally take it up and beat it flat down.
Then you can laugh all you want.
Sunday, August 06, 2006
+ sAy +
'Say, one day you wake up, and you realize that all that had happened in the past 20 years is actually just a dream. What would you do?'
This was just a passing notion I had one day, and I thought of asking my friends about it.
And it was a wonder to see the interesting initial responses by each individual, due to different perspectives, and even different intepretations.
"See if i like what i was then, or maybe will do what i really should have since i can learn from that dream....."
"Carry on with the current life after the dream. Reality is after all reality for us to continue living......"
"I would be in a total loss and feel helpless. I will try to find out what in reality happened to the 20 years when i am asleep........"
"Maybe at that very very moment when i know that, i may just cry. Mixed emotions. If those happy things that happened in 20 years are just a dream, isn't it rather sad.....?"
"I will feel lost. But then life goes on... who knows... maybe this reality you woke up to is just another dream again......"
"I will do nothing. It's just a dream. So just carry on living as per normal......"
"You mean i'll be asleep for so long......?"
"I think i'll be quite sad and lost. But after that i'll still live as normal, and keep the dream as memory......"
Some answers led me to lots of laughter, while some set me thinking. But actually none of these answers are crappy or whatever. In fact i find all of them good answers. Because my friends really thought through this question, and gave me answers that came from the very bottom of their hearts, which i appreciate a lot. Because some people might dismiss me as being crazy or don't even bother to entertain me. But these friends actually took the trouble to give it some thought, and actually tell me what they think. And some even went into deep discussions about it with me! Really thank you!
For those who know me well, they will know that every now and then, i'll pop questions that are quite neither here nor there(of course, the ideas usually pop into my head from out of nowhere too, thats why the questions are neither here nor there |pun intended| haha). Which is also why there will often be many ways to intepret those questions.
For those who just got to know me, well, there's more questions like this to come! Hahaha...
Anyway, for me, at that very moment, I will feel lost too. But after that, I will probably feel relieved. After all, it's a 20 years worth of lessons to learn, and decisions to be made. All the 'lessons learnt' and 'decisions made' in the dream, shall allow me more wisdom in living my current life. All the sadness in the dream will help me grow, and all the happiness in that dream, shall always be part of my memory. It's like having a second chance at Life again, even if it's 2 totally different lives.
One of these friends commented that it was as if he had always been living in a dream. Everything seems unreal. But to me, there seems no difference. Life is but a dream. So long as you live the way you want it to be, it doesn't really matter if you are living in a dream or reality, isn't it?
Sometimes, it's really a wonder how Fate works. Many a times, in the most unexpected situation, the most unexpected will happen. So much so that the unexpected become expected
(probability expectation: UNExpected multiply by UNExpected = Expected. UN is cancelled out).
Perhaps it's really true how the saying goes: In every dire situation, an opportunity arise.
It is only up to Fate if that opportunity is meant for you to grab, or it is meant to simply fall into your hands.
But then again, even when Fate has it that the opportunity falls freely into your hands, it is still up to you to hold it properly and not lose it. So in the end, it is still up to you to use it WISELY.
And therefore it is up to me. Even when I am very scared. Really very scared. But I can not, will not and shall not give up.
G00d luck to me!!
PS: This entry contains more than one topic, so apology if the words don't link.
PPS: Any feedback to the above question in the very 1st line is very welcome.
Disclaimer: The equation of "probablity expectation" is not taken from any printed textbooks and is wholly based on my own theory, aka CRAP lah!
This was just a passing notion I had one day, and I thought of asking my friends about it.
And it was a wonder to see the interesting initial responses by each individual, due to different perspectives, and even different intepretations.
"See if i like what i was then, or maybe will do what i really should have since i can learn from that dream....."
"Carry on with the current life after the dream. Reality is after all reality for us to continue living......"
"I would be in a total loss and feel helpless. I will try to find out what in reality happened to the 20 years when i am asleep........"
"Maybe at that very very moment when i know that, i may just cry. Mixed emotions. If those happy things that happened in 20 years are just a dream, isn't it rather sad.....?"
"I will feel lost. But then life goes on... who knows... maybe this reality you woke up to is just another dream again......"
"I will do nothing. It's just a dream. So just carry on living as per normal......"
"You mean i'll be asleep for so long......?"
"I think i'll be quite sad and lost. But after that i'll still live as normal, and keep the dream as memory......"
Some answers led me to lots of laughter, while some set me thinking. But actually none of these answers are crappy or whatever. In fact i find all of them good answers. Because my friends really thought through this question, and gave me answers that came from the very bottom of their hearts, which i appreciate a lot. Because some people might dismiss me as being crazy or don't even bother to entertain me. But these friends actually took the trouble to give it some thought, and actually tell me what they think. And some even went into deep discussions about it with me! Really thank you!
For those who know me well, they will know that every now and then, i'll pop questions that are quite neither here nor there(of course, the ideas usually pop into my head from out of nowhere too, thats why the questions are neither here nor there
For those who just got to know me, well, there's more questions like this to come! Hahaha...
Anyway, for me, at that very moment, I will feel lost too. But after that, I will probably feel relieved. After all, it's a 20 years worth of lessons to learn, and decisions to be made. All the 'lessons learnt' and 'decisions made' in the dream, shall allow me more wisdom in living my current life. All the sadness in the dream will help me grow, and all the happiness in that dream, shall always be part of my memory. It's like having a second chance at Life again, even if it's 2 totally different lives.
One of these friends commented that it was as if he had always been living in a dream. Everything seems unreal. But to me, there seems no difference. Life is but a dream. So long as you live the way you want it to be, it doesn't really matter if you are living in a dream or reality, isn't it?
Sometimes, it's really a wonder how Fate works. Many a times, in the most unexpected situation, the most unexpected will happen. So much so that the unexpected become expected
(probability expectation: UNExpected multiply by UNExpected = Expected. UN is cancelled out).
Perhaps it's really true how the saying goes: In every dire situation, an opportunity arise.
It is only up to Fate if that opportunity is meant for you to grab, or it is meant to simply fall into your hands.
But then again, even when Fate has it that the opportunity falls freely into your hands, it is still up to you to hold it properly and not lose it. So in the end, it is still up to you to use it WISELY.
And therefore it is up to me. Even when I am very scared. Really very scared. But I can not, will not and shall not give up.
G00d luck to me!!
PS: This entry contains more than one topic, so apology if the words don't link.
PPS: Any feedback to the above question in the very 1st line is very welcome.
Disclaimer: The equation of "probablity expectation" is not taken from any printed textbooks and is wholly based on my own theory, aka CRAP lah!
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
+ F0rMa| wEaR +
Why do I dislike wearing formal wear?
Firstly, because I have to stand and sit up straight!
Secondly, because the cloth material for office wear is too "unbreatheable"! Long sleeves, not breatheable, plus the hot weather makes me sweat till......
C00l on the outside, but 'raining' in the inside!
Thirdly, i have to wear court shoes with formal wear. Yes, they give me BLISTERS!!! Ouch!
Fourthly, they are expensive. Sobz..
But lastly, and most importantly, they are a facade to me. The main reason why I am not comfortable in formal wear is because whenever i put on formal wear, i give most people a wrong impression of confidence, maturity and wisdom, which is particularly useful during presentations. (But of course, once I speak, the facade will be shattered)
The fact that I write the above down is precisely because i am not trying to brag!
Because in reality, I am not confident. I am not mature. And I am definitely not wise!
And I certainly do not like people to think that I am a clever and confident girl only to tell me a few months later after knowing me that how much mistaken they were! (Even though they do not mean it to be a sneer)
I just want to say, how I look or whatever impression I give whilst wearing formally and behaving formally is totally unintentional. I have always tried to show the true me via my actions, words, behaviours. How I look, is totally beyond my control. Because i can't see myself.
Perhaps the day when i am able to say that i am comfortable wearing formal wear, when I am comfortable giving people the right impression of confidence and maturity, will be the day when I am truly, inside and out, a confident person. =)
Firstly, because I have to stand and sit up straight!
Secondly, because the cloth material for office wear is too "unbreatheable"! Long sleeves, not breatheable, plus the hot weather makes me sweat till......
C00l on the outside, but 'raining' in the inside!
Thirdly, i have to wear court shoes with formal wear. Yes, they give me BLISTERS!!! Ouch!
Fourthly, they are expensive. Sobz..
But lastly, and most importantly, they are a facade to me. The main reason why I am not comfortable in formal wear is because whenever i put on formal wear, i give most people a wrong impression of confidence, maturity and wisdom, which is particularly useful during presentations. (But of course, once I speak, the facade will be shattered)
The fact that I write the above down is precisely because i am not trying to brag!
Because in reality, I am not confident. I am not mature. And I am definitely not wise!
And I certainly do not like people to think that I am a clever and confident girl only to tell me a few months later after knowing me that how much mistaken they were! (Even though they do not mean it to be a sneer)
I just want to say, how I look or whatever impression I give whilst wearing formally and behaving formally is totally unintentional. I have always tried to show the true me via my actions, words, behaviours. How I look, is totally beyond my control. Because i can't see myself.
Perhaps the day when i am able to say that i am comfortable wearing formal wear, when I am comfortable giving people the right impression of confidence and maturity, will be the day when I am truly, inside and out, a confident person. =)
Friday, July 28, 2006
+ tW0 s0re FeeT, l0ts 0f w|zArDs, aNd a bUnCh 0f f|0weRs +
Actually, today isn't a very special day for me. Even though this is supposed to be a mark, a proof of what i had sow all these years. But it isn't very anticipated. After all, it started with a rainy weather.
Somehow, i found it rather hard to smile, when everyone around was smiling. I just had a neutral feeling about everything. And on top of it, i felt lost. Everyone was busy grabbing friends for photo shooting.
I'll stand around and try not to get into people's way.
I didn't want to go in too early, because i didn't want to miss any friends whom i know might come along. Luckily, i still managed to take photos with the few friends whom i wanted to take. My faithful friend tuck a few strands of my messy fringe under the mortar board and said,"
Smile! You should smile widely!" I simply told her," I feel very lost."
So she accompanied me in, looked for the place to take attendance, looked for my seat number, waited for me to collect my attendance card. And after joining up with a few other friends and engaging in a few more and merrier phototaking sessions, she and another friend suddenly
presented me with a bunch of flowers!! Oh! That was really sweet and thoughtful of them! My very FIRST bunch of FRESH flowers in my WHOLE life!!
"So what?" my mother laughed. "Your first bunch is not even from a guy!"
So? Who cares?
So long as it's from someone who really cares! I'm more than glad to receive it from my good old girlfriends! Yes, much more than glad. I'm overjoyed and grateful! Thank you lots girls!
You don't know just HOW MUCH those flowers brightened up my day! I really love it!
Then I went in, get seated, and simply waited for the ceremony to begin. And begin, it did.
Suddenly, all my professors whom i had seen and never seen before marched smartly in. All dressed in cute, artistic and colouful robes.
There was one lady who "glided" up the stage before the others, her robe billowing behind her.
Suddenly, I saw Hogwarts.
If one took no notice of what we were wearing on our head, I saw all of us sitting there, dressed in wizarding robes. It was like at the end of the year in Hogwarts, when everyone came together to be addressed by the teachers. There, I saw Professor Dumbledore, in his dark purple robes, taking his seat right in the middle. Then one professor, i can't remember his name, he was dressed in blue. He had a meek expression, and he immediately reminded me of Professor Quirrell.
Where is Professor Snape, I wondered. Scanning the stage to look for one resembling him. But too bad, no one looked as sinister as him. Therefore i concluded he had returned to Lord Voldemort's side to continue his spying.
But all in all, I saw lots of wizards, and us, lots of young witches and wizards! It was so CUTE! It was a dream come true! With my obsession in Harry Potter fantasy, and suddenly i find myself immensed in it! Wearing oversized robes that billow behind me if i walked faster! Hahaha.. Okay, call it self-entertainment in the midst of boredom. Though it really worked. Never underestimate the power of Imagination!
After the ceremony, hahhaa.. the best part. Something which my friends and I had a habit to do during our school days. BUFFET!!! NICE f00d!!! G00d food!!! FOOD!!! Hahaha... That's right! Dinner provided by our school. That's what they are best in anyway.. hehez.. And all the going around and grabbing and hugging friends and professors to have a chat with them one final time. This time, I really smiled and laughed heartily.
But sadly enough, though there were many tables, there was no chair. Imagine me trotting around in a 3 inches high heels the whole night. What do you get? Yes. A pair of sore feet! Diaozzzz......
In the cab home, my parents were complaining about the fact that during the ceremony, the looooong ceremony, when the only short moment when I was to walk on stage, and they were about to take a picture of me, two marshallers stood RIGHT in front of the camera! For the whole 2 hours, NO one in front did as much as MOVED. But the moment my name was called, the two marshallers came and stood right in front. My dad tried to shoo them away, but to no avail. Finally they walked away, just at the moment i was about to step OFF the stage.
Hahaha.. Is this coincidence? No. I call it Fate. It was fated that I will not have a picture of my "triumph", shaking hands with the Dean(Dumberdore). But it's alright. In the end I was the one consoling my parents. Hahahaha... But really, I did not feel any resentment or disappointment. As i already said earlier today, i felt very neutral. Today is not a special day. So what does it matter if i had a photo of me shaking the Dean's hand?
But just before the cab reached my home, i made a conclusion of today.
I had done what i had expected to and wanted to do. I had taken photos with the friends and professors I had wanted to take with. I had seen some friends whom I believed will be the last time I'm seeing them. Except for one thing. Remember i once had an entry during the exams times, when my graduation was very uncertain. http://starlightdream.blogspot.com/2006/04/sprt.html
I once said I hoped to take that photo with him, so that I can make a perfect ending for the four years of Uni life. Now, I had managed to graduate on time. With him. But still, I did not manage to have that photo. Perhaps it was really meant to be, or meant not to be.
Nevertheless, I am content. Sometimes, it is the imperfection that makes things perfect.
Because after all, nothing in this world is perfect.
And what's more, I have already received 3 bonuses in one day today.
Two sore feet, lots of wizards, and a bunch of flowers!
^^
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)